Next Monday is Tax Day in the USA. This week’s set will, we hope, provide a little Tax Day humor.
WARMUP: 1040EZ (10 minutes…or 400 yards…on your own)
FILING JOINTLY OR SEPARATELY?: $200
Claim some dependents and determine if you will file jointly (8 X 25 using various drafting patterns) or separately (200 pace-line draft, changing places at each 50).
DO YOU WANT $3 OF YOUR FEDERAL TAX TO GO TO THE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION CAMPAIGN FUND?
If your lane votes NO, proceed to the next part of the workout. If your lane votes YES, the rest of the team will watch as your lane does 3 FAST sprints from the blocks.
INCOME (FROM ALL SOURCES): $600
1 X 100 freestyle for each form of income, as follows:
Wages and Tips: Alternate 25 fingertip drag and 25 free
Interest Income: Breathe equally to right and left
Dividends: No breathing from flags into the finish
Tax Refunds: Tennessee Turn at the 75; finish with 25 backstroke
Short Sale: Finish each pull at the hip, not at the thigh
Overseas Investments: Mid-pool flip on each length!
401(K) ROLLOVER TO (F)ROTH IRA: $100
4 X 25 flutter kick on :35 (use fins if necessary to make sendoff)
First half of each 25 is easy kick on your back. At mid pool, roll onto your stomach and finish the length with BIG FAST FROTHY KICK.
AFFORDABLE CARE ACT (OF KINDNESS): 50 easy recovery
YOUR CHOICE OF STANDARD DEDUCTION OR ITEMIZED DEDUCTIONS: $400
Itemized Deductions: 1 X 50 for each deduction, as follows:
Charitable Contributions: 50 Free
Medical Expenses: Freestyle with Tennessee Turn
Intangible Drilling Expenses: Freestyle, start the 50 with 3 streamline jumps
Mortgage Interest: Freestyle with Tennessee Finish
Gambling Losses: Freestyle with mid-pool flip on first 25
Alimony Payments: Breaststroke Separation Drill
Student Loan Interest: Backstroke Catch-Up Drill
Casualty & Theft Losses: Kick on your back, holding kickboard over chest
Standard Deduction: $400
1 X 400 choice
ADJUSTED GROSS INCOME: $400
Choose one tax bracket from the following:
Tax Exempt: 1 X 400 IM
The 1%: 4 X 100 IM
The 99%: 8 X 50; FL/BK…BK/BR…BR/FR…FR/FR…Repeat
Alternative Minimum Tax: 1 X 400 pull
FILE FOR AN EXTENSION: 50 easy with LONG strokes
HIRE H&R BLOCK: $100
4 X 25 choice, alternate 25 FAST from the blocks and 25 easy
WARMDOWN: MAIL TAX RETURN AND WAIT FOR REFUND